"I Ran Faster", which appeared in the original "Apollo," has been replaced by the following two poems.

Individuation

 

Full moon mandala

of perfect peace

spinning my life

like a ball of

yarn unwinding.

Nights and new moons

repeat themselves:

the mandala is completed

begins again and

the disappearance

one day becomes my

own being ended.

N.N.

 

 

Winter Night, New York

 

The Winter horizon prisms the setting sun.

Its icicle splinters the color into spectrum

bands that circle the earth like bright wool mufflers

packed 'round a snowman's head, while the digit

of night slowly pushes back the cuticle

on a polished, manicured moon. The hand

of buildings stretches and opens to the sky

its elegant black glove, torn at the finger tip,

where that sharpened crescent of moon pokes through.

Below the throat of the horizon, the city's

newly donned jewels begin to gleam,

winking like precious gems and distant suns,

As the Star,

cool and slender-necked Manhattan, commences

to invent her frosty evening face.

N.N.

 

 

(The following poem did not appear in the original bound 1985 version of "Apollo." It has replaced "Upon Reading THE ORIGIN OF CONSCIOUSNESS IN THE BREAKDOWN OF THE BICAMERAL MIND.")

 

Intimacy -- February 14

 

I never heard him.

He was stealthy as that

full moon that judged us

from afar with cool

impartial eye, as

he slipped behind me and

requested my money.

 

I was impressed with

his manners; he spoke

softly like a lover

who merely needed

something I could bestow.

I understood that

he would not take my purse;

I would open it,

I would give him all

he said he wanted.

He'd promised not to hurt me.

 

Then he fled like the

February wind

that rushed into the

vestibule to fill

the void he'd left with

swift departure.

 

He disappeared as

magically as he'd come,

a modern Mercury,

messenger from an

underworld I could

not fathom, in black

skin and blue Nike wings.

 

Later in the line-up

his eyes, blinded by

the one-way mirror,

gazed deeply into mine

as he saw only himself,

not remembering

that date in the lobby

when his same glance and

head averted themselves

to avoid this moment

he surely must have foreseen,

when once again my

own eyes would hold his

shame and know his soul,

not an evil soul,

as though we'd lain naked

together, sharing more than

brief moments in a hallway.

 

The random act connected us

forever and I knew him

absolutely, knew

just why he did it.

Concatenate seconds

chained him to his victim,

bound him closer

to his humanity

than he'd ever been before.

He'd learned no better way.

 

And I have gotten verse from him

while he may serve his year.

N.N.

 

 

Jan Zwicky: Philosopher, Poet

 

I gasped as I read your poems

Neatly deployed, a slim Black volume

A stellar expanse of White.

Infinity cannot imagine

A Man leaving such a Woman.

When I met you on that night

Leaning into the wall, tall

As I am tall -- No, taller still --

Dressed just in Black, all in Black

Fairer hair than mine pulled starkly back

I gasped again -- half awe, half fright --

As if beholding first sight the

Cold and Tender Goddess of the Moon.

How pale seemed my images

Next to your snow like blooms!

In the face of such lunar raiment

I can only guess he left

In fear of being the one bereft.

N.N.

 

 

A Charm

 

On the scrap of tape which

Covetously binds this book,

I found stuck today a

Curling strand of your black pubic hair,

And with this same vital filament

That now minds my verse of love vows,

I cast a magic spell

That binds your love to mine

Until the day you find

This twining amulet

And secrete it from

My Witch possession.

N.N.

 

 

Medieval Theme

 

I cannot prove I love you.

Like the Fundamentalist who

Would deny Darwin's truth

With his Medieval reasoning,

Since never has he seen

Evolution evolving,

You repudiate my proofs

With tortured "knowledge" intuitive,

Unrefuted Word of God Himself,

That you refuse to put to test.

Since states your hypothesis:

She loves me not (or less)

Can you not create experiments

To test and reach conclusions?

Will you still draw and quarter science?

Or like some Grand Inquisitor

Do you expect survival on your

Rack my love to disprove or

Prove: if she drowns*, she wasn't a witch;

But is she should live, she is?

Does this confirm the heretic?

N.N.

 

  *Original version says "dies" rather than "drowns."

 

 

More Than Perseus

What could be worse than to know
You can never satisfy the woman you love?
Much better not to see it;
No surprise he hates me today.

And you who now so fill me up
Must wonder not at such vain tremblings
Just because you were brave enough
To look me in the eyes and face me
On your own, needing no shield.

You used no mirror tricks to take me.

Men who can view Medusas
And still live, even love, will forgive
The evasions of those who dare not shatter myths.

N.N.

 

 

 

 

• Fishing the Sun with the Moon